Category: Blog

JOURNALING…..not just a teenage thing

Journaling…. it’s NOT just a teenage thing!
So, you’ve heard about journaling…. but the only thing that comes to mind when you think about it is a teenage girl laying on her bed, legs swinging in the air and writing ‘dear dairy… ’


If this sounds like you, don’t worry you’re not the only one.

But there’s got to be more to it then this airy-fairy diary writing…surely????? And I’m here to tell you YES, there totally is!
AND Journaling is rated one of the best personal development tools you can use. 

So lets clear this up…

What is journaling???
Journaling is writing down your thoughts, feelings and emotions. You can do this in a book, a piece of paper, heck you could even use a shopping docket if you wish. The process is just about allowing yourself to write whatever comes to mind. It does not have to be neat or have correct spelling & grammar…just a free flow of your thoughts.
Oh, just a heads up, research does suggest that writing has a greater impact than typing.
Also, the thing about journaling is that we can all do it slightly different. It’s about finding what works for you and doing it in a way that it will serve you and your purpose. You can journal every day like Einstein and Leonardo Da Vinci. You can do it when you are faced with a challenging situation or event like I do. You could do it as a gratitude journal or you may find you just want to touch base with yourself once a week, fortnight or month.

So…how can writing my thoughts out onto paper actually help me???

There are endless benefits of journaling. From a number of published studies that suggest journaling can help people with a variety of mental health disorders and eating disorders.
As well as better cope with stressful events, relieve anxiety, boost immune cell activity, increase emotional intelligence aswell as increase focus and motivation.

My fave benefit which is still find so fascinating is ‘Journaling can increase your immune system.’
When I tell people this they generally respond with a confused look asking how writing out your thoughts can actually do this. So let me explain;
As the world around us is getting more and more stressful people are living in ‘fight and flight’ mode most of the time, if not, all the time. Unfortunately when you are living in this state our body shuts down all our unnecessary functions; digestive system, reproductive system, immune system etc. (Which was awesome in pre-historic days. Who wants to go to the toilet when they are getting chased by a saber tooth tiger.) As you journal the process helps calm you down and relieve stress. Taking you out of ‘fight and flight’ and allowing your body to put these functions ‘back on-line’ and start functioning as they should.

There was even a study done in 2013 where a group of people were asked to journal for 20mins a day, 3 days in a row before a scheduled medical biopsy. What they found was that the wounds of 73% of the people who journalled were completely healed in 11 days!!!
WHAT!!!! Crazy hey???

So let me give you a real life example of how writing out your thoughts can actually help bring you clarity and relieve stress in a normal situation. 

So your husband has really upset you. Maybe you have come home from a busy day to a trashed house, dishes not done, or dinner might not be cooked and that’s just the beginning. By the time you get into bed you’re so angry with him and you want to talk it out…only to hear his breathing getting deeper and deeper. How can that **** just roll over and go to sleep and I’m laying here so upset. Doesn’t he even care?  So you have the choice to lay there getting yourself more and more upset with the loop on negative thinking going around and around in your head. OR you can get up and journal. Set the timer for 10mins and see where it takes you.  What this allows is those negative loop thoughts to come out. Once you move past those you give yourself an opportunity to get deeper and start to gain clarity and understanding where all the frustration and anger actually came from. With this new clear perspective you can find ways to deal with the situation. You are the expert on your life…you just need to see and understand it better.

This process actually happens as writing access’s the left hemisphere of the brain, which is the analytical and rational part. So while this part is occupied the right side is free and can do what it does best which is create and feel. In this way, writing removes mental blocks and allows more brain power to better understand our-self and the world around us.

“It’s not the situation or event that causes us stress and anxiety its how we process it”

Have I convinced you to give journaling a go yet????
Hey, what have you got to loose right???

Grab your journal and start writing out those thoughts and see how it works for you!

I love talking journaling.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions or need that extra little push to unlock your power within in…

Remember you are the expert in your life…. I just give you the tools to unleash it!!

My 3 Fave Gratitude Exercises

With so much information on the internet and self help books its so hard to find out exactly what you can do to bring you that little bit closer to happiness and ultimate fulfillment.

But one thing I bet you stumble across regularly is “Gratitude Exercises” and for a great reason. Now this is not just because I love them and say that everyone should be doing them!  But also because there is so much research backing the benefits.

So… if you have never done them before, or if you have dipped your toe in but never really taken the plunge…


Then today is your lucky day because I’m going to share with you my  



First off all… why do gratitude exercises????

Well you might have heard about something called  ‘neurological pathways’. These are what transmit the signals throughout our brain. Basically, if you can imagine our brains are like a road map and the neurological pathways are the streets. What we don’t do very often create the small suburban streets and what we do and think often become the main streets, like highways. Creating our go-to thoughts, the easy route with less effort and thinking.
My favourite explanation on how our regular thought patterns create these ‘go-to highways’ was from a mindfulness facilitator. She described it like our brains are constantly on ‘auto correct or auto predict’ just like our phones. The more we use certain words the more the phone can predict what we are about to write…like when you try to type duck and your phone corrects to something else…(come on, your phone knows you never talk about ducks ;))
So the more we think certain words or thoughts the more our brain will auto predict and go straight to those words and thoughts.

Basically your brain is just like any other muscle… if you regularly think negatively your brain will get really good at thinking negatively and vice versa.

Also, the research suggests that those who practice gratitude often can experience huge benefits. Such as Improvement in physiological health, increase immune system, enhanced self-esteem, increased mental strengths, reduced symptoms of depression, increase sleep time and quality and the list goes on!

Have I talked you into giving it a go yet?


So…. How do we do it?


There are so many ways to bring gratitude into your life…


 1) Journaling
This is probably the easiest and most popular gratitude exercise.
You write in your journal 3-5 things you are grateful for. This can be as simple as a dot pointed list or you can go into a little summary of each one. The benefits of this exercise allow you to zone in on all the great things that have happened to you over the past day or week. The research behind the amount of journaling you should do has some mixed results. Some have suggested at the end of each day, some say once a week. But basically its whatever works for you. Have a look at the purpose you want it to serve. If you start to dread doing it then clearly you need to back off a little bit.
Just make sure you sincerely focus on what you are actually grateful for. Try to focus on people in your life rather than objects.

Oh and one more thing.
When you are journaling it’s not intended for anyone else’s eyes. It can be messy, the grammar can suck and who cares about the spelling. As long as it makes sense to you, that’s all that matters.


2) Gratitude Jar
This is an awesome way to write down what you are grateful for and it can have amazing results in increasing your general well being and outlook on life. Plus, if you’re the creative type you are going to love creating your very own gratitude jar.
So first of all you need to find your jar, box or even a little bag. Then decorate it to make it your own. Think ribbons, stickers, paint, glitter… whatever you have to make that jar beautiful.
Then everyday think of at least 3 things you are grateful for. Write them on a piece of paper and pop it in your jar. Now these can be something as simple as ‘I’m so grateful I have some comfy as slippers on this freezing morning’ or as deep as ‘I’m so grateful that I have a loving boyfriend/husband or beautiful child.’ This will get you thinking positively about your day. The plus side of this exercise is whenever you are having an extra shitty day, get out a few of your gratitude notes and read them. As they’re such a great reminder of the good you have in your life.

Last but not least…


 3) Gratitude Rock
Now this is a goody! The reason I like this one is because it incorporates a mindful moment with gratitude…bringing you out of your head and into the present moment, and lets face it, everyone can do with some more mindfulness in their lives!
So what you need to find is something as simple as a little rock or stone or another little object that means something to you. Make sure it is something you like and easy enough to carry around with you! You can carry it in your pocket, on a necklace or even your bra if you must. Just take it with you!!
Every time you look at it or touch it, you must think of something that you are grateful for in that moment. It can be for the yummy chocolate bar… I mean…. piece of fruit you’re eating, the sun shining on your face or even the smell of rain. It just has to be something in that moment (woohoo mindful moment- if your not to sure about mindfulness don’t worry, that’s my next blog)
At the end of each day when you put that object down think of all the things you were grateful for throughout the day. Then in morning when you pick it back up again to take with you, think again about all the awesome things you were grateful for the day before.
This will get that brain muscle training so hard that those highways in your brain couldn’t be anything but positive.


So there you have it, may 3 fave gratitude exercises.
And if you are lucky enough to have ever worked with me I would of made you do at least one of these.

So what are you waiting for?
Pick the one that stands out for you and give it a whirl…. what have you got to lose?
Only those negative thought patterns right???


Change doesn’t happen by chance!

If you keep doing what you have always done, your going to get what you’ve always got!!!!


If find you are struggling with your gratitude exercises but really want to give them a go contact me I would love to help.

Who the heck is Tenika???    

Have you thought about using a coach but there is so many out there that you find yourself thinking…
Who the hell am I supposed to I sign up with?
How do I know if this coach will get me?
Will I get this coach?

Well, I’m here to tell you that this is completely normal- In fact, this is important!!

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What the heck is a life coach???

So you’ve seen these ‘life coaches’ pop up in your social media? You’re intrigued by some of the content? But you’re slightly, lets say… skeptical? What do they actually do? Do they work? It’s just a scam right? Can they really help me? Improve my life…. just like that?

Well let me tell you, life coaches are flippen amazing! And no, I’m not here to sell you on how awesome us coaches are; I am here to dispel some myths of the coaching world…

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